Well, for starters, I could not do PDA (public displays of affection) if there were Indian people around. Sometimes we will be walking holding hands, and he goes, “Oh, look at that Indian family!” and I’ll instinctively pull my hand away, and he will laugh hysterically. I think I do this I didn’t grow up seeing many public displays of affection because I feel like all Indian people are related (?!), and. I’m so weird. He used to get irritated he makes fun of me with me, but now. The irritation is preferred by m :D.
Also, I now own and use china, can skeet shoot pretty dang well, write thank you notes often, eat…salad….LOL, and celebrate Thanksgiving! On his end, he doesn’t wear shoes in the house, pronounces Indian words correctly, unlike 99% of the population, makes a chai that is mean gives people money that ends with the increment of $1 (like $101), and always checks the vegetarian menu at any restaurant we go to before sitting down.
How do you make it work when you both grew up with different family cultures?
This has been a learning process for both of us. Sure there’s a difference that is cultural but every couple will go through this to some extent because every family does things differently. The way you grew up with your family isn’t necessarily the way that is ONLY do things with your family. The white way wasn’t always the way that is right. We weren’t always down to do it brown. My husband and I learned that we are both people that are stubborn thought our upbringing was “more correct.” We quickly realized that wasn’t true at all. Talk it out. Pick and choose what is really important to you. Otherwise, adjust with everything else and understand the final end goal here is harmony, not a need to be right.
People often think that interracial dating is just the thing that is craziest. But in my opinion, then everything else is secondary if you’re the same in your core with your values. If I could give you advice, it would be this: don’t think that just because someone is the same as you on paper, they will make a great life partner. A great life partner is someone who supports you, celebrates you, acknowledges you, respects you, and complements you.
If your family is the one preventing you from being with someone because of something as shallow as the color of their skin, I hope you shall be able to help them see the light. My husband and I bring two completely different sets of everything to the table, and sure, it takes some time to sort through all of that, but our different upbringings and cultures are less important to us than our mutual pursuit of Christ. Our cultural differences are a strength for us because our foundation is the same. That’s what interracial relationships are actually like.
Beautifully written Shruthimma!! Just ?? ?? like you always do- feels like you are sitting in front and talking to me
This is a great post . Im salvadorean and my fiance is white but we live in California so people are more open to interracial couples here but we just went on vacation to Arkansas and Memphis and we experienced a couple of different situations with very akward comments and people looking at us while we were holding hands or kissing! But I think I agree we have the same desires and goals for our new family with you we come from two different backgrounds but. I was born and raised in El Salvador and Patrick was born and raised herer in America but we have the love that is same God and passion to be a family and love each other.
What a great read! I can’t believe people asked you if you were marrying a white boyfriend because you don’t like your own race. That’s messed up. Along the relevant question of kids, I have a follow up question. Them the choice to decide on what their religious beliefs are since you and Hank are both Christians, will your kids be taught Hinduism by your family, in turn giving?
Thanks for reading Komal! We will raise them in a Christian home since Hank and I are both Christians and were Christians before we got together. They will learn about other religions throughout their lives and ultimately their faith decision will be up to them!
Adore this post – thank you for sharing! ?? x
This is exactly what I needed to read. Loved this post, and thankful I came across it.
So happy to hear that Uma! Thank you for reading!
Hmm many of the situations that are same seen. Wife is from Tamil Nadu and Im from from US. We live in Georgia now and never see any racist or attitudes that are bad us of the kids. Closest is some ladies that are old indian grocery store staring but oh well.
Happy to hear you haven’t any racist or attitudes that are bad yall or the kiddos! That’s a blessing!
Well this is a good article, but what you forgot to say in the beginning was the fact that you both were Christians. That takes a major barrier off the table. I know of an couple that is egyptian-Italian divorced over disagreement over which religion their kids should be bought up in. Skin color and cultural is a major barrier, but religion is an important one too :). Thank you for sharing :). God Bless
Thank you so much for this article, it was a read that is wonderful! I just wanted to know a little bit more about you being Christian, while being raised by Hindu Brahmin parents. How and when did that come about, and if you could specify reasons for being christian too, I’d appreciate it! Thank you! ??